What's YOUR Sass Quotient?

It was super windy here last night, so I made the best of it when I walked in and said, "Hey, Tim, what happened to the dish?" His response: "What do you mean? It's not on top of the roof?" followed by immediate marching out to the front of the house for a full inspection. He comes inside and says calmly, "It's still up there." I say, "April Fools!" The kids crack up.  Ahhhh! I love April Fools Day! (Never get between a man and his satellite television....haha!)

And earlier today, I thought I'd try to pull off a super-girly Sofia move, but the princess saw right through me. I couldn't believe it. She said, "Mom, can you put batteries in my magic wand?" I said, "You know what, Fia? I don't actually know how. That's something daddies are really good at." I could not even say that with a straight face. The feminist in me was punching me in the gut and I was already feeling guilty enough to consider saying, "April Fools!" when she put her hand on her hip and said, "Mom...you're a grown-up and grown-ups can do anything." (Man, my child is sassy.) I said, "You got me. I was just going to say 'April Fools!' Instead, I'll go get batteries, and I will teach you how to put them in because little kids can do almost anything too."

Which brings me to my next story...Gabe has come home every day this week from spring break camp going on and on about all the fun things he did that day, and on Monday night, he announced he was going to get the blue ribbon the next day. I asked him, "What's the blue ribbon again?" Gabe says, "Oh that's what I get for swimming the whole way across the pool." I look at him, contemplating: how do I tell my kid he can't really swim? I say gently, "Gabe, you need to be careful, okay? You can't touch the bottom of the pool at the deep end, remember?" He says, "Mom. Don't worry. There are lifeguards at the pool watching us." Wow. He is fearless.

So naturally I tossed and turned and could not sleep, envisioning my little guy drowning. The next day as Gabe put his stuff away when I was dropping him off at camp, I explained my concerns to one of his camp counselors, who said to me, "You're a mom, so I'm not going to tell you not to worry because that's what you do. You worry. But let me tell you -- all the kids think they're going to get the blue badge, and I bet 15 of the 17 kids will get the red badge. I'll keep an eye on him." Gabe came up at exactly that moment and demanded to know, "Mom! What are you telling her?" I looked at him, a bit panicked as I realized he might be embarrassed by this exchange, and this camp counselor came to my rescue. She interrupted to say, "Gabe: your mom was just checking to see if she had paid for your bowling field trip on Thursday and to make sure she had lunch for you." She winked at me. World's cutest camp counselor. I'm so happy we sent Gabe there this week. He has been ice skating, swimming and bowling and playing every other game under the sun with lots of kids his age. Sofia, of course, is irate that she is not at camp too. I tried explaining that daycare costs a lot of money and we can't afford to pay for daycare and camp, but she was not hearing me.

Sofia was adorable earlier in the week though. I went in to wake the kids up one morning this week to find Sofia making her bed in the dark. She didn't want to wake up her brother. My heart just melted. It's amazing the simple things that make us smile. I had no idea she even knew how to make her bed, and there she was, making her bed in the dark. I must've gushed about how happy I was that she was making her bed because next thing I know, Gabe has popped up, made his bed, AND is picking up his room. He cannot stand to be outdone by his sister. I think it was my friend Jen who said I should bust out the vacuum cleaner next. lol!

Oh -- one last story for now: Gabe and I were practicing last week for a line he had in a play, and I asked him, "What's your cue?" He said, "melancholy." And Sofia piped up with, "Who's Melancholy?" haha! I explained it was a fancy word for sad, and she goes, "Oh. Well, why not just say 'sad' then?" Sassy -- did I say she's sassy yet in this post? Lord have mercy.

Happy holidays everyone. Much love to my Jewish and Christian family and friends...